They said it would get better….

They said it would get better….

They said it would get better,

After losing my mom.
They said it would get better.
In a way, it has 
I went from wailing to weeping, 

weeping to crying, 

crying to shedding tears. 

Each & Every Mother’s Day, 

six of them, 

since she’s been gone.
What I would give for one more day;

One more hour.

But, I did inherit her pragmatism.

I know in the end, the outcome will still be the same. 

It pains me to say Happy Mother’s Day to others. It’s not their fault; it’s my own pain. I never mean it to be cruel but it is hard for me to acknowledge this day

It’s harder for me than April 21, the day of her passing 

So I do what I know how to do best; 

Grind. 

Work.

In the hope that some where on the other side of the river Jordan, 

she sees and she is proud

I miss you Ma. 

My Hair is Not a Threat

My Hair is Not a Threat


Last week, when I was coming back from the ACLU staff conference in Phoenix, I had another disturbing encounter with TSA regarding my hair. For those of you that have seen my social media posts or know me, you know that I am on the road constantly. I’m steady racking up those frequent flyer miles. So it was a little surprising to me when I was randomly selected for a search. I went through the machine, joking with the TSA agent as to why I never get randomly selected to get $20 million. He responded “I’d even take $10,000”. We chuckled and I continued through the machine. A different agent told me I needed to wait for a female scanner to pat me down. I waited patiently. 

And waited. And waited. Luckily, I was very early for my flight (which is not always like me). 

The female agent came, and as usual, I raised my arms for her to pat me down. I then lifted up my hair so that she could see there was nothing underneath my hair. And she said “oh, that’s what set it off… your beautiful long hair. You’re free to go.”

Back in 2011, TSA was under fire for racially profiling women of color.  I have gone through security many times;  anytime I was pulled out of the line it was to do an inspection of my hair.

My hair is not a threat. I’m waiting to hear one story of a woman of color who smuggled a weapon in her hair. 

All that comes to mind is the clip from the original blaxploitation movie from 1974 Foxy Brown, where the amazing Pam Grier in the lead role concealed a gun in her Afro to avenge her man’s killer. 


But that is never happened in real life or at airport as far as I have been able to tell.

 I know that we have made so many high tech advances; how come agents can’t scan  and see that there’s no metal or weapon in my hair? I just find it more than a little annoying that my hair is perceived as a threat. Don’t get me wrong, I am all about safety and security. But there also needs to be a reasonable basis for a search, not just having different hair to perceived norms. If there has been no precedent for it, then what’s the issue?

At this juncture, I am not going to file a complaint. I’m more annoyed than aggrieved. But I will start documenting this issue to see if there is a pattern (area of the country, time of day, etc). So my fellow ladies with locs, we’re going to be have to be vigilant on this issue. Because profiling is never ok. 

Please check out information from the ACLU about your rights at the airport. 

Has anyone else experienced or witnessed this? Please share! 

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Diva on Channel 10: United, Police Shooting & Protecting Haitians

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This past Easter Sunday, I was back on the WPLG Channel 10 “This Week in South Florida” Roundtable, taking on some tough topics.  Check out what I had to say on the United Airlines fiasco, the charging of a police officer in North Miami for shooting unarmed caretaker of an autistic patient Charles Kinsey, and the importance of extending the temporary immigration protections for Haitians.

See the Roundtable here.

New on HuffPo: Victim Blaming & United

New on HuffPo: Victim Blaming & United

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United Airlines CEO Oscar Munoz (left), Passenger Dr. Dao (right).                                                     Photo Credit: AP/Twitter

 

Hi RLD Family, 

Please my latest in Huffington Post on the continuing saga of Dr. Dao, who was violently dragged off of a United Airlines flight.

This week, many people were left in shock after viewing the troubling video of 69 year old Dr. David Dao being dragged from his seat on overbooked United Airlines flight from Chicago to Louisville. Amid the public relations nightmare for the airline, another story has been emerging — that the doctor is a convicted felon. Dr. Dao was involved in issuing fraudulent prescriptions, possibly as part of a destructive romantic relationship. He was convicted in 2005, having lost his license to practice medicine when he was first indicted in 2003. After a long battle, probation, and paying his debt to society, he received his medical license again in 2015.

Knowing the background actually does explain why he was so reluctant to get off the plane. It was reported that Dr. Dao stated he had patients who he needed to attend to in the morning, which is why he refused to relinquish his seat. Dr. Dao was probably was thinking “I am certainly not missing my appointments so soon after getting my license back”.

But why is his past relevant? Why do we care?

Read the rest here.

“You’re so articulate” is not a Compliment to a Woman of Color

“You’re so articulate” is not a Compliment to a Woman of Color

As I watched the #BlackWomenAtWork trend on Twitter, I was given life and inspiration. African-American women from all over the country, and arguably women of color all over the world, shared examples of times that they were belittled, insulted, or otherwise demeaned for being who they are. This hashtag was in response to Representative Maxine Waters being insulted by Fox news host Bill O’Reilly as well as Press Secretary Sean Spicer’s degrading treatment of correspondent April Ryan at a White House press briefing. Both are women of color, well accomplished in their fields. 

I shared my experiences on Twitter– which were previously shared on this blog (see here) — under this hashtag,

A conservative female attorney I am acquainted with responded to my thread, saying “well, maybe it was just a compliment; you really are articulate“. Her statement is symptomatic of the deeper problem of when something is brought to the attention of some in the mainstream, often folks feel the need to dismiss it, refusing to look at the deeper issue. In my response, I encouraged her to read through the hashtag, and understand the context in which this was being shared. I noted that one of her followers indicated “Some people have a chip on their shoulder and can’t accept a compliment“.

Here’s the deal. As the saying goes, don’t urinate on me and tell me it’s raining. Human beings are intelligent enough to know when they are being complimented, and when they’re being insulted. You will never see one white attorney compliment another white attorney and say “wow, you are so articulate”. That comment is rooted in a stereotype and surprise. The stereotype is that African-Americans are uneducated, live in the hood, and cannot form complete sentences. Mainstream media and BET have not helped that cause. And certainly the demise of the Cosby show didn’t help in that either. But be that as it may, that is the stereotype. The surprise comes in “oh wow you’ve beat the odds to actually be able to speak in full sentences“. That is not a compliment. A compliment would be “wow I really liked your presentation” or even “you really articulated that point very well“. But to tell a professional woman or man of color that they are articulate is at best a backhanded compliment. Wow, people that look like you never sound that way.  It assumes of course as all stereotypes do, that you were poor, in the hood, and was never going to have a chance to succeed. That is simply not the case. If a similarly situated White person rose from poverty and made it, nobody turns to them and says oh you’re so articulate. They actually assume that the individual came from a privileged background.

The entire context of the hashtag represents the assumptions and stereotypes that are made of women of color in the workforce. Here are a couple I found telling:

These assumptions and stereotypes can be based in racism, but others can be based in implicit bias. It is the unconscious bias that one may have towards a group of people. We all have a biases; it is how we act is a different story. The key is to be aware and if someone says “this is offensive to me” don’t tell them that they have no right to be offended. You learn from the experience, and move forward as a better person. I expect someone to correct me if I did something offensive, endeavoring never to repeat that mistake again. But it is the tone deafness, or simply the lack of care for your fellow person, that makes these hashtags necessary.

At times, I wonder if it serves more of a supportive dialogue  within races rather than a dialogue between races. Only time will tell.

I would also like to take you back to some articles that highlight this issue that I’ve written in the past. Both have to do with judges of color in different parts of the country, and the bias they encountered on the street. Take a look: A Teaching Moment About Racism: The Judge and the Candidate and Racism: In Case You Weren’t Sure — Judge Attacked in Chicago

It is said never to judge a book by its cover. Everyone would be served well to follow that mantra.

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Diva on the Channel 10 — the Sequel

Diva on the Channel 10 — the Sequel


Hi RLD family,

Last Sunday, I had the honor of returning to Channel 10 news Roundtable, “This Week in South Florida”. It was an outstanding time. We got really deep in the debate as to whether or not Governor Scott was wrong to remove State Attorney Aramis Ayala from the Markeith Loyd case for her stance on the death penalty; the fact that no charges were filed in the death of Darren Rainey [the inmate who was boiled to death by prison guards], and lastly, the ongoing debate on healthcare. It definitely got heated at times but it was a healthy debate on the issues. In case you missed it, check out the link here and share your thoughts! The Roundtable begins at 26 minutes. 

HuffPo: 1st African American Head Prosecutor in Florida Wrongfully Removed

HuffPo: 1st African American Head Prosecutor in Florida Wrongfully Removed

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Yesterday, Florida Governor Rick Scott overstepped his boundaries by removing Florida 9th Judicial Circuit State Attorney Aramis Ayala from handling the Markeith Loyd murder case for her refusal to seek the death penalty. The defendant has been charged with the Orlando murders of his pregnant ex-girlfriend Sade Dixon, and Orlando Police Lieutenant Debra Clayton.

State Attorney Ayala explained her decision, stating that she was no longer seeking the death penalty in any of her cases, because “Florida’s death penalty has been the cause of considerable legal chaos, uncertainty and turmoil.” She further said capital punishment often leads to years of appeals and other court hearings, and that it costs more than a life sentence. Florida law gives every state attorney the discretion on whether or not to seek the death penalty.

Ms. Ayala holds the distinction of being the first African American state attorney in the state of Florida. Elected in November 2016, she assumed office at the beginning of this year. In her short time in office, she now also holds the distinction of being the only prosecutor removed in this fashion by this governor.

 

Read more here

ICYMI: The Diva on Channel 10 Roundtable! 

ICYMI: The Diva on Channel 10 Roundtable! 

Hi RLD Family,

I was really excited and honored to be a part of WPLG South Florida Channel 10 Roundtable this past Sunday.  On “This Week in South Florida”, my fellow panelists and I debated the topics of the repeal of the Affordable Care Act, as well as immigration. I had a great time, and will be on again next Sunday.

As the segment ended, we started to talk about the false narrative that immigrants commit more crimes then United States citizens. That is patently untrue; I saw this in the courtroom when I was a prosecutor. A recent study published in the New York Times said what I already knew – – immigrants commit crime at half the rate of natural born citizens. Please see the link to that article here

Check out the fireworks on the show here.

Feel free to share your thoughts!
M. 

Legal Divas of Color: Mildred Loving

Legal Divas of Color: Mildred Loving

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Mildred and Richard Loving in 1967 courtesy of Francis Miller/The Life Picture Collection/Getty

Usually, my Legal Divas of Color series features female attorneys that have been trailblazers in our world. But after seeing the Oscar nominated movie Loving  [finally], I was moved to switch gears in my final Legal Diva of Color for Black History Month 2017.

Mildred Loving was a woman of color who married the love of her life.

Small problem: he was white, and it was the 50’s in America. This was at a time in history when there were laws for bidding interracial marriage (called miscegenation laws). The couple lived in Virginia, but went to Washington DC where interracial marriage was legal to get married. After being arrested (snatched out of their beds in the middle of the night while she was far along in her pregnancy with their first child), a long legal battle ensued. The Lovings pled guilty to violating the “Racial Integrity Act“, with the condition that they do not live in the state of Virginia for 25 years.  The Lovings were close to their extended family; the forced separation began to take a toll. After urging from a family member, Mildred Loving wrote a letter to then Attorney General Robert Kennedy. He was not able to help her, but he referred her to the American Civil Liberties Union. The legal battle continued, winding its way up to the Supreme Court of the United States. Finally, they received relief with the ability to live as man and wife in 1967.

The tragic ending of the story is that Richard Loving passed away seven years after they won their battle — killed by a drunk driver. Mildred never remarried, and lived in the house that he built for her until the day she passed away. When interviewed before she passed away in 2008, she said “I miss Richard. He took care of me”.

That was one of many times I was brought to tears during the course of the movie. It was very much a love story as well as a legal battle. The Lovings overcame so much just to be together but they did not get their “forever” story in this life.

When I heard that quote, I think back to this weekend where I was struggling with a really bad cold. As I was laying down mouth breathing, my husband calls to me from the next room “did you use Vicks vapor rub?” I couldn’t give much of an answer because I felt so terrible. He came in, rubbed the afflicted areas, gave me a kiss, and left the room to continue what he was doing. I think of those small tender moments in the context of love, and what Mildred was missing for those years after her Richard passed away.

The other emotional part of the movie for me was the involvement of the ACLU in fighting for this couple and all couples to follow be able to marry who they love. The Loving case is part of the basis used to obtain the rights for gays to marry in America. This case has so many ripples; if the ACLU did not take on the battle, it would be a very different story. My husband and I, as well of hundreds of thousands of other couples since then, would not be able to legally be with who they love.

I am so proud to be a part of this organization. When asked during my interview why I wanted to come to the ACLU, I said quite simply “Loving vs. Virginia. If it was not for the ACLU, I would not be married to the love of my life.”

As an interesting footnote, most states struck down their miscegenation laws immediately after the Loving ruling. Alabama, however, was the last to do so in 2000. 40% of the population voted to keep this law, even though it was unconstitutional.

Although she is an unlikely heroine, Mildred Loving is one nonetheless. Mildred Loving, thank you for being a Legal Diva of color, paving the way for people to marry who they love  regardless of race or gender.

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Iconic Life Magazine photo of the couple, taken by Grey Villet 

See the original news report below:

Legal Divas of Color: Jasmine Twitty

Legal Divas of Color: Jasmine Twitty

The RLD Black History Month segment continues with our Legal Divas of Color.  Black history is always evolving, with people of color breaking barriers and challenging stereotypes.

Often when folks think of millennials, they think of a spoiled generation who lives at home for as long as they can.

jasmine-twitty

Jasmine Twitty challenged that perception by becoming the youngest judge in South Carolina history in August of 2015. At the age of 25, she has reached a goal that, as many can attest, others have spent their lives pursuing with no success.

Judge Twitty is a Greenville, South Carolina native.  She graduated from the College of Charleston with a degree in Political Science.  Before ascending to the bench, she was a court clerk in Greenville’s 24 hour bond court.  She worked nights and weekends, learning about the court system.  In 2011, she decided that becoming a municipal judge was the path for her. As she put it in an interview with Jenna Regan  of the blog  “Smart Girls”, she became intentional about her goal.

She sought a judicial appointment in the town of Easley, South Carolina.  In South Carolina, the city council is the body that appoints judges for the municipal court.  It is not required that one be a lawyer, or a resident of the town in which they seek appointment.  After going through the interview process (which can be quite intense), she finally attained her goal in 2015. As a non lawyer, Judge Twitty had to complete a training program, and pass a certification exam.  She will have to take continuing education courses, and be re-certified every eight years.

See the interview Judge Twitty gave to local television station WSPA a few months after her appointment.

At the end of the day, you have to go for opportunities, and not self deselect.  So many times women, especially women of color, put extra requirements on themselves in addition to the qualifications they already have. “I’ll be ready to apply x position after I do xyz“.  She may be overqualified, and yet she is still doubting herself. Others fall into the trap of “I need to wait my turn”.  Judge Twitty is the perfect example — if you want it, go for it!

Best of luck to you Judge Twitty, and thank you for being  a Legal Diva of Color!

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